The time has come where we are finally bidding adieu to Brad Compton-Bearne, our resident cricketing maestro-turned Oaks legend. Farewell, Brad, off to conquer the South Wales cricket league while leaving behind a trail of chaos, laughter, and a fair few broken bowlers.
We held onto hope that Brad’s romance with Emma would fizzle out like a damp squib, but alas, they went and got engaged, sealing the fate of Brad’s Oakley career. As Gordon might quip, it was “the final nail in the foot” of his Oakley career.
For those unfortunate souls who haven’t witnessed Brad in action, picture this: a batting performance so wild and wacky that you’d gladly pay a £20 entrance fee just to watch. Brad’s centuries were like watching a circus act – jaw-dropping and side-splittingly hilarious. Bowlers tried to sledge him out of his zone, but Brad just laughed his way to victory, leaving them scratching their heads in disbelief.
From turning up to games in trousers three sizes too small to demolishing a league 2 player with a tennis-style six, Brad’s antics were pure entertainment. His fellow players couldn’t contain their laughter, often turning away to hide their amusement at the unfolding carnage.
But beyond the boundary, Brad’s heart belonged to Oakley. Despite tempting offers from bigger clubs, Oakley was his home. Whether he was belting out Titanic tunes at karaoke or demolishing a whole trifle for cricket tea, Brad was the life of the party and the driving force behind many Oakley victories.
It’s been a 4 year bittersweet goodbye, allowing us to slowly wean ourselves off our Brad dependency. But fear not, Brad will return to cheer us on from the sidelines, proud of the club’s progress and forever a part of Oakley folklore.
7 centuries 18 fifties and 251 sixes will not be easily replaced.
Farewell, Brad – it’s been one heck of a ride!